1.Yesterday, for the testimony time, we were invited to share our problems - that's what fellowship /family should do; be there for each other.
Shamefully, I commented "Oh no, not problems....there's nothing worse than listening to other peoples problems"!
Ironic really.
2. I'm one of those people who doesn't have birthday party's for fear that no one would come. I very rarely arrange stuff for the very same reason.
Don't get me wrong, I love socialising, being with people, but can't get over this fear.
Well, that was until yesterday, when, after days of convincing myself it was the right thing to do, I took the bull by the horns and went ahead with a plan.
Did I do the right thing? No. Should have stuck with my instinct. It only took a matter of hours to realise why I don't do such things. And now it's too late.
3. I hate being judged by other people's standards.
13 comments:
But Dawn, other people's standards are not our standard's. They have no right to judge. They can admonish in love, but not judge!!
Fiona, agreed - you're right (as you usually are!!)
Whether they should or shouldn't is kind of besides the point, isn't it.
They do.
Full stop.
How can you prove that your intentions are 'honorable' (is that the right word?)
I make decisions all the time, like everyone, and I always think about 'others', but 'others' can and do make judgements - even if they are wrong.
I struggle with this too Dawn. When discussing self-image people are often saying to me, 'by whose stadards are you judging yourself?' But the way I see it, that's not really the point. People do have an opinion of me, and I want it to be a good one. The only way to do that is to meet their standards.
I wish there was some sort of 'rule book' which gave explicit instructions on the standards we 'ought' to meet, so that everyone would expect the same of us!
I find myself constantly trying to persuade people that my intentions are honourable, mainly because my assumption is that they don't 'believe me' about things, and yet I have to admit that I don't really know what is going in their minds. I jump to conclusions about the way they judge me when in all honesty, they are probably not even thinking about me in the first place!
Kirsty, We do all want people to have a good opinion of us, but we don't all think the same way. At the end of the day, others are always going to make a judgment or form an opinion, and that is down to them. If you're comfortable that you are trying to "do the right thing" then there's not much else you can do, and you just have to leave them to it. Would changing who you are to try and please others make you feel happier with yourself?? I'm going to guess at no, and you shouldn't have to do it. Perhaps it's a case of others having to learn how to have differing views and respecting people for it, rather than making judgments based on their own values???
I have spent far too many years worrying about what people think of me. It messes up your life!
I think what Fiona has said it's a far simpler, and briefer way of saying what I was trying to!!!
Yeah, but I didn't say I had got over it!
But it depends on how much it affects your life
How do you mean Dawn?
I feel like I'm coming in late here, and I can't work out what has gone amiss for you today, but....firstly - was it me? ( just checking) and secondly, these people - who are they and where do they live? Let me at 'em!!
Yeah, me too! Ooh, Liz - I so just pictured you as scrappy doo!
Scooby-snack anyone?
Kirsty - I think what Dawn means is that you can worry about what people think SO much that it stops you doing stuff, stops you being affective, you become a shadow of your potential!!! Am I right Dawn?
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